Undressed

I can't be me in this leather
bound fabric, fears together
I can't seem to iron out
this internal self doubt
So I turn and flash you
Hoping you will attach to
my nakedness my truth
my serious side my youth
I need you, untie these knots
Your eyes unwind these thoughts
But you have to like me better
underneath this cashmere sweater
So I show a little skin
two tears a little grin
praying that you'll see
how stiff wool can be
But you like my leather
my tiger prints, my feathers
You place fur over me
as my final coating
so I strut in my heels
look good in my teal
This is who you want
curly hair and pumps
I resign to the fashion
smiles and fake passion
I can't undress myself
I need your help

KISS: Chapter 1, The Origin of Kiss Lavinia

Life aint fair. Now you hear that from all these people throughout your life but for me, I lived, breathed…was that statement. I was born during a tornado warning. Now if that isn’t unlucky, I don’t know what is. I couldn’t even be born on a bird filled drinking lemonade leaves gently falling from the trees kinda day. But I digress.

My name is Kiss Lavinia Tomwell but most people call me Kissy. I was born in an old raggedy barn in Nightingale, Georgia during one of the worst series of storms in the Southeast. While the air was swirling and growling with fury, my mother matched the gusts outside with cries of her own. The first person I ended up seeing was an old white lady who happened to see my pregnant mother walking in the storm and pulled her inside before the worst of it. She saw me and took one look at my dark brown skin and wide eyes and said I looked like a Hershey’s Kiss. I guess my mom thought it would be cute to name me that. I don’t blame her though, she was only fifteen at the time. And so now I’m here… Kiss.

My mother still lived with her father and stepmother in a little blue house on the corner of Wicker Avenue and Harrison Circle. The next morning when the storm had died down, my mother brought me back to that house. My grandfather and Grandnanny were not that shocked to see me in her arms. After her getting pregnant in the first place, I believe they always got themselves ready for odd events.

The first fifteen years of my life were spent in that baby blue house with the porch. My grandfather was a nice man but he was distant. He made sure that my momma knew I was a mistake and in the process that became real clear to me too. He always bought me little pieces of apple candy and licorice or would pat my head when I ran past him to go out and play, but I would always cringe at the way he looked at my mother, like a traitor. I still loved him though like my own father. He was only thirty five when I was born, still king of the world. Every day he would get up and dress in a nice blue or brown suit with matching high gloss Stacy Adams smelling like Ivory soap. His six five slender frame commanded attention but his playful wink and chuckle always made a winning impression. In the little town we lived in, I could name on one hand the people who didn’t like Lester T. Tomwell. He had dimples in each cheek, almond colored skin, and big dark brown eyes. He made sure to get to know each one of the customers who came into his liquor store and never forgot to say hello to a familiar face. He was the It of Nightingale alright.

Now my grandnanny, I call her that because she said she wasn’t ever anyone’s mama and she will never be referred to that way, was Mrs. Lillie Tomwell. She was the member of my life I could have done without. One thing I have to give her was the fact that she was beautiful. She was a real gold color that changed to red in the summer and yellow in the dead of winter. She had the legs of a dancer and hips of a nurturer. Her hair was jet black thick and long and she always let it swing. She was granddaddy’s prize and she always reminded him of that. If he didn’t come home with something for her, you always knew a fight was coming.

And she never liked my momma. You see my momma was competition to her –every bit as pretty and even lighter. They were only separated by a decade so she felt picking on Momma was fair game. Since granddaddy and momma hardly spoke, she would constantly find ways to torment and tease her husband’s teenager. She would only pick on me in dark places though. She knew granddaddy didn’t like her messing with me but she did it anyway. She found ways.

My momma was the saving grace of the house. The only one who I didn’t have to be polite to, just could sit down and talk about anything. She always made me feel that way. She’d sit me down on the bed and whisper real soft.

“I see you poppyseed. Momma sees you. What do you want her to see?”

She asked me that question every night and every night I would shrug and shake my head. She would smile and tuck me into bed.

We were more friends than anything else. I thought of Momma as her name not as her title. We would talk and laugh together for hours. She was still very much a kid. Sometimes I felt like I needed to protect her. She felt like she needed to protect me. We needed to protect each other.

Stormy Weather

It is the dark rainy evening portrayed in horror movies. I sit by the mountain cliff, legs dangling off the side. My drenched hair and clothing cling to my skin but I feel no rain. They will come for me soon.

Knowing I had little time, my mind drifted back to the past few hours. The beautiful redhead in black is sitting in my parlor as I come in from Mother’s. I pause briefly to hide my shock and ask politely who she is. Her eyes widen and she calls my husband’s name. Happier than ever, he leisurely strolls into the room with her refill of champagne. Only after he saw me did his face and the glass drop. Instantly, rage overtakes me. How dare he? How dare she? Tears of anger blind me as I race from the room. My husband, Jason follows me through the house frantically calling my name. As I pass the guest bedroom, I see the letter opener gleaming red from the sunset. I grab it and hide beside the night stand. My husband’s calls grow louder and louder.

“Maam? What are you doing out in this weather?”

The rain has eased because I make out a police officer’s uniform. He is a thirty something bald man with pale skin and a whiny voice. I hear myself tell him that I was just out for a stroll. He tells me to come with him. I oblige and get into the cruiser, looking out the window to tune out the officer’s chatter.

My breathing slows as I hear the footsteps bringing Jason closer to my hiding place. Images of the woman and my husband streak through my mind like marathon runners. I can feel my sanity leaving my body. The maniacal personality of a scorned woman overtakes my body and murder overtakes my mind. I press my body into the wall as the door opens. A scream tears from my throat. It wasn’t Jason.

“Coffee Miss?”

“What? Thank You.” I did not remember getting out of the car or walking into the building. I tell myself to get a grip. Time never moves backwards.

“We’ll keep you here ‘til the rain dies back down.”

I cup the lukewarm coffee into my hands and look around the walls of the small town police station. The walls are a dingy white and all the chairs have ripped seat cushions. This place looks as dull as I feel. This is where I belong. Leaning back in the seat, I watch three other officers enter the room. They pause at the sight of me while the bald man tells them the story. I do not smile or blink; my mind carries me back once more.

Her hair is the most beautiful red I have ever seen. Her eyes are bright and her figure is flawless. At least he picked a gorgeous mistress. She walks toward me explaining the situation and trying to say soothing words. Her name was Regina. The name fit her youthful dignified aura. I am more irritated at her tone than the discovery of her in my house. I clutch the opener and lunge forward at her. A scuffle erupts. I fight like a madwoman; she fights like a guilty child. It ends in her blood. I stumble away as if in a dream. Gasping for breath, I drop the letter opener and lean on the wall for support. What had I done? The tears of anger return as tears of despair. I went from eating teacake with my mother this morning to a slain woman by my feet at nightfall.

I sniffle as my mind connects with my body. The officers are staring blankly at me. They probably know the situation and soon will put me behind bars. Instead of angry words or the click of handcuffs, I feel the warmth of a blanket against my shoulders. Another officer wraps my soaked hair with a coverlet and sits down in front of me.

At once they start asking me why a beautiful woman is sitting by herself in the rain. Where did you come from? Who are you? Are you married? I sip the bitter coffee as I tell them my name is Alexandra Mellon Jeffrey and I am still married. I live on 122 Sunny Haven and I was just out for a stroll.

After telling them several miscellaneous facts about me, they begin to bombard me with their pasts. I listen intently trying to gather names. Only one officer catches my attention. Lieutenant William Jones has prominent features and a stately presence. He talks of his deceased mother and beautiful young sister. His mother is the daughter of the millionaire of Charleston, Richard De Pointes. His sister is all he has in the world and he feels more like a father than a brother. They lived together outside of Charleston because his sister loves the country. Running fingers through his fire red hair, he eagerly shares his hopes and dreams for his eighteen year old darling. I tell William his love for his sister is respectable and I wish them happiness. He kindly smiles and says thank you. I ask him if he has any pictures of his family and he dashes off to search for his photos.

An officer named Kyle continues with a story of his Cocker Spaniel when the front door opens. My husband looks relieved to see me and immediately rushes to my side. Apparently finding a shovel does not take that long. I introduce him to the men coldly.

“Thank you, officers, for rescuing my wife. The rain must have gotten her off course. Now that the rain has let up, I can assist her to the car. We are going to take a trip to her mother’s.” I raise an eyebrow and push his hand off my shoulders. My mother only lives ten minutes away and Jason hates her. I see the young woman’s clear blue eyes in my head, suddenly wishing my husband had been outside that door.

I stand and thank the man that brought me to the station. As Jason and I leave and walk to the car, he whispers that everything is taken care of. He adamantly states how sorry he is and this was the first and final betrayal of my love. No one will ever know of his transgressions or mine. The sound of his voice turns my stomach and only cowardice stops me from running back into the station. As we pull away from the station, the young man runs out waving a photograph. I watch him slowly fade from sight in the drizzling rain, too exhausted to ask Jason to stop the car.

Watching the car speed into the darkness, William Jones finally lowers the photograph as his friend comes to his side. Alexandra was such a beautiful woman that he could not help fondness for her. He prayed silently that she would find comfort for the problems ailing her. Wanting to get home, he goes inside to collect his belongings. One of the officers stops him placing a hand on his shoulder.

“That Alexandra is a sweetheart.”

“Yeah, too bad I didn’t get to give her the picture. Regina would have loved her.”

Persistence Personified

Slowly you make your way into my mind
persistence personified
Even thou I try deep within
To trap you behind my defenses and away from my soul
For this love could be blessed or cursed
And I could care less either way
I want to speak so loudly that the world is awakened
But instead I sip my colada and just breathe
I have never been so shaken
The permanent damage your heat could do
The worlds you could collapse with your words
Yet magnetically pulled and pinned
I let you creep back in once again
And deep down inside my desires caress
My inner imagination
Could we potentially infect the world
With an essence only conceted when
We.....mmmm......slowly
I sip once again and I imagine this
blue hazed world in which we can indeed
Explore this passion that makes me smile
When you slowly make your way into my mind
And my fears are cast upon the sails of hope
What if....maybe.....potentially
And within that minuscule piece of time
you reside....completely
and within that minuscule piece of time
you are mine....completely
I don't know how to move, think, converse
When I'm around you
Yet away from you the galaxy stands between
Our time again
Our beauty is in perception
And for the first time....in a lifetime
I wish my ancestors had not formulated
such revolution and pride
Because if I had to choose between the blues and loving you
We would be together neath a weeping willow tree
Wouldn't care who was beating me
You see baby....I want us to be.....
Timeless, without end or reproach
The historical example of love personified
Then slowly my thoughts are interrupted
By you texting me
And we once again reside in a world
that inhibits and hinders
I text you back....and sip...and sniffle
Gently I wipe away the moistures of reality
And hope you will come over tonight
Why?
That maybe...that possibly....that what if
and within the span of time
Hopefully you will become mine
If persistence I personify.

Ode To Cologne

Luscious
The way that Givenchy
Hugs that curve within your neck
A single thought of you
Creates rivers
I lower my head
To compose the swimming
Debauchery that has formed
When envisioning our
Bodies behind smokescreens
I never forgot you
And I will always love
The exact pressure
You apply to my hips
And within my world
You will always exist
Among the silk stockings
And ruby red stilettos
That scent drives me so crazy
My baby
I need your heat, your sweat
That tingle from your teeth
I try to look into your eyes
They send me too far away
Beyond pillows and sheets
And into manifest destiny
You blow against my ear
To set me a sail into Aphrodite’s paradise
Adorned with the covers of lovers
That must smell of Kenneth Cole or Marc Jacobs
I’m sorry darling
I must turn my head
I am just not ready for the impact
Of this love and this love making
The room is quiet
But our shortened breaths
Create gaps in a lifetime
You whisper against my ear
I nod and the world gets hectic
For a few seconds
And as my nail prints begin to dissipate
We again can breathe normally
Lay my head
Within the curve of your neck
And let my head swarm
Envy? No…Dreamer Yes
And then your scent
Is covered by the heat and sweat
The romance is gone
Or perhaps never resided
Once again I see you
Beyond the haze of
Maniacal passion
Once again I can look into your eyes…
And I do
For a timeless second.

Desperate Little Girl

He was so beautiful to me
The skin of an African warrior
The body of a black linx
The presence of Julius Caesar
And I like my African heritage pre-told
Became his Cleopatra
His majestic moronic prize
Venomous to my soul
He led me down a Robert Frost two way trail
And I tripped upon all the footprints
He hugged me then pushed me
Kissed me then beat me
And All the while he was the conquering hero.
“Hail Caesar, we who are about to die, salute you!”
And once my legs were open
And my heart just as equally.
He pulled away the riches of Egypt
To Leave me in abandonment against the
Walls of Eden
And Still today
If my bow legged silky black linx
Rubbed gently against my legs
I would put my head in between his jaws.
Because I got used to the Sphinx and the pyramids.

DO IT

Do It
Ive got no where to go
And from what you think the wounds wont show
So do your worse
So you can see
Everything you do takes no place with me
Ive got concrete
running through my bones
I wont be undone
By no Love Jones
So Do It
So you can feel
My heart's reinforced steel
Theres no such thing as love's sting in my house
So before you pick your weapons and start running about
Understand that your plan
cant stand in the sand that I lay about mine
Please dont waste your time.
Like bees to lions
Like flowers to bees
Go on sweetie and do what you please
Cuz I know what I do
And I know you too.
And I can tell you this now.
Shit don't fly in my house.

Untitled

I speak truth because I rarely see it.
I am a lady because so few can be it.
I leave the drama to the crooks and thieves.
I leave the gossip and the plots and schemes.
I walk alone because so few can join me.
Define myself because they think its corny.
I cry my tears to meet my destiny.
Not to validate your thoughts of me.
I shake my head because they think its easy.
They do and then they sho don't wanna be me.
And so I turn my head to the side.
press on my pedal and enjoy the ride.
You see the moral of the story's simple.
The world wasn't born to be your kinfolk.
So I just ride steady think free.
And lean back, comfortably me.

Brothers....

And so I speak
I speak to the multitude that call themselves my brothers
I am yours in all that you do
Proud brown and strong I stand in the gaps made by time
I am the glue to our shattering culture
When your tear falls
I am already racked with grief
When your shout emerges
I am already creating change
And so I act
I am a Black woman
And I am yours
For all time
I will understand you
Stand with the ointment to heal your wounds
Stand with the dagger to face your enemies
I work tirelessly
To gain your approval
Which I value as much as my own
I am not above you
I exist with you
Don’t be scared by my achievements
Don’t be worried by my possessions
I still love you
I still need you
You are more precious now than I can say
But this is the day
To join me
So I can become
Everything you conjure in your dreams
Everything your mother instilled in you
I am your sister, in the purest form
I would never betray you….
So do not damage me.

Untitled

Our principle cries blood tears
At their future arrival
Washed away chance for greatness
Gin streaked sweat, lust’s saliva
Selling our birthright for the price
Of man’s jaded approval,
A few white men on paper
Fueling work ethic refusal
And thus pure principle dies
The sword forged by perspective
Blind eyes against the problems
None are wrong so none protected

Unmarked graves must be weeping
Their dreams were buried with them
Access to different freedoms
Still living out our whims
So quick to bring fist to chest
Breathing is pain; death relief
The Clink Clank Clink Clank still heard
As Black shuffles its feet
Obsessed with competition
Fed by selfish ambition
Subjugation of others
To prevent self submission

The rain falls, God is displeased
Black was made by divine thought
Please More, Please More, determination
Looking back at why Black fought
A proud hybrid of culture
Black should reign as an emblem
Not watching others climb up
And struggling to commend them
Our principle wails loudly
As a wake up call to We
All the regality, beauty, possibility, agility, humanity, ability, humility, fertility, and RESPONISIBILITY
Should once again.
exist in.
our territory.

The Winds

The winds are subject to change
Yet in the wonder lust of yesteryear
We become something that is not
A portion of our manifest destiny.
We stress and strain to regain
A piece of life not worthy of desire
Too ignorant to know that
We were never supposed to take
Residence in that place

The winds are subject to change
Yet we look forward praying to
Our God that we don’t believe has
The Power to fulfill the very fantasies
We seek yet are so afraid of.
We plan and plot
To overthrow these other souls
We believe are in the way of our
Self structured plans, shifting the balance
Nature struggles so hard to maintain.

Scared Little Rabbit, the winds are subject to change.
They were never constrained to one direction
Or one temperature or one severity
They do as they please
They never want to take destiny from oceans or trees.
The winds know who they are supposed to be.
Taking on the world with pride and confidence…
The wind is exactly what you see.
The winds are subject to chance, so why shouldn’t we be?

Endurance

I’m in pain
My body shaking
From lack of kisses, smiles, and touching
No prescriptions
Just endurance
The Cold is like ice
Burning and freezing my soul
I want to cry
But my tears turn to crystalline
I cry out
My words meet not my existence
Reasons escape me
Just endurance
I yearn for a tip of a finger
My hearts jumps at the chance for…
Love.
I bite my lips until I taste blood
To fight back my inner most thoughts
Worthiness
I have no answers.
Just endurance.
I stand in stable condition
But the pain still comes
Frost stops the IV drip
I just want to be alive completely
I drop my head
There are no fantasies
Just endurance.

I Am A Black Woman

My booty’s gotta be rotund
My titties out to never
But my waist gotta stay 26
With no cellulite ever
My kinks are accepted but my conscience screams weave
I am a Black woman
And that’s how it be.
I ain’t really femininst
I ain’t really civil
I cant be conservative
Niggas gotta be the liberals
Gotta vote democrat
Wait pray and see
Cuz I’m a Black woman
And that’s how it be
When I bitch
Its never really for a reason
Can’t date a White Man
Nigga that would be treason
Can’t Ask my man for money
Then I’m a hooker with a fee
Cuz I’m a Black woman
And that’s how it be
I’m a ho if I have three babies
No Daddies just maybes
I didn’t sleep with myself
Has the fucking world gone crazy??
But I gotta shut up
And take care of my seed
Cuz I’m a Black woman
And that’s how it be
Makeup comes in two shades
Black and really Black
My button nose and big feet are always under attack
Light skin trumps dark skin
Girlfriends have no loyalty
Cuz I’m a Black woman
And that’s how it be
Oooo but my swagger is envied and I stand for revolution
My womb will birth a people that are immune to this pollution
Not only am I a math scholar
I am a literary whiz
I am a Black woman
And That IS how it is.

LISTEN!!!!!

I have something to say
And it won’t be the way
I portray these words
No it WILL be the message they convey
See I’m sick of us yelling
To get attention
For words that mean nothing
The real deep down
Nitty gritty
Shit aint too pretty
SPEAK!!!
Your voice ought to crack
Your soul ought to ache
When you show your voice to the world
See we all got something to say
Its programmed into the way
We live life
We live strife yall
Your words ought to permeate your walls
Fills your dormitory halls
Your struggles your troubles
Your faults your falls
LISTEN!!!!
Fashion people money
Yeah that’s nice
But we all need to talk about LIFE
If its silence we aint living it
If we yelling we aint getting it
LISTEN!!!!
Take in what your brother is saying
Not the Nikes he’s wearing
Or the ice he’s displaying
Don’t let your culture die
From the game that you’re playing
Take the time to hear the movement
Hear him say Help me
Hear her say Love me
THEN SPEAK!!!!
Defend the ones you love
Don’t stand in the shadows
Yelling nonsense up above
Reality Check- God sees you He saw you
Enough is Enough
Be CATIOUS!!!
What you don’t say in still there
What you do say is in air
Love your brother, love yourself
Then Words are only fair
Let your mouth be a weapon
A tunnel to your soul
Only then is life accomplished
Only then are words whole.

America Mine

I place a blackened kiss
To her cherry lips
You see America is my mother too
Not by birth
She adopted us all
But I being the middle child
Had the longest road
To self identification
And like any family
We kinda dysfunctional
Me and my blonde brother
Sometimes, We don’t get along
We got different daddies so
You know how that go.
I spent most of childhood in the country
So when I moved to the city
He started acting sididdy
But he warms up to me everyday
Guess we all got our ways
I gotta fight a little more
to get Mamas attention
Gotta be the strongest
the brightest
the flyyest
My mama beat my ass
for my mistakes
she see the potential
but you know them parentals
My younger siblings and I
Fight for q. time
Fight for a taste
Fight for a space
We all got different daddies so
You know how that go.

The Plea

I’m so used to
Being closed
Being the secret
No one knows
But brittle bones
Hope not to break
And I truly hope
For my sake
That you love me
I’m so used to
Being so cool
Laughing at alllll
The other fools
But spinach greens
Dream of fruit pie
And my last wish
For this night
Is that you love me
I’m so used to
Being the star
Just not caring
Where you are
But jagged stones
Desire precious jewels
I know I’m breaking
All the rules
Just love me
I’m so used to
Being alone
The pangs I feel
Come so strong
But the devil
Still loves the Savior
And from you
I need a favor
Please love me.

Special

I thought I was special
But beside the majesty of your Lion’s pride
I cried
Cuz see I wasn’t your one and only
Your baby your sweetheart your boo your honey
I really thought you loved me
Though I know now that was irrelevant
We couldn’t build on schizophrenia or laziness
And yes it was my haziness
That allowed my thoughts of rings and baby shoes
But don’t call this singing the blues
Cuz I just had to get this off my beautifully sculpted chest
And Yes
Go on with my God ordained life
I’ve learned for a thousand, heard from the masses
Other fish swim near cuz, heartbreak always passes
I’m not mature enough to thank you for my lessons
You’re still an annoying son of a bitch
But I wish
You all the best in your acts
But the fact
Is that we have past our deadline
Now its time to collect
Respect
Is the key to everything my dear
But I feared
I couldn’t let you go to save my life
But my life aint you
So now its through
Cuz I thought I was special
And I am to every single person but you
And hey…that’s cool

Lustfully Delicious

Lustfully delicious
I bite my lips
As you come into view
You always knew
The way to grip my hips

Tantalizing destiny
The passion, the heat
No room for chagrin
It should be a sin
The way you taste so sweet

Hmmm…jalapeno ecstasy
The pleasure and pain
There is no vanity
Mmm.. there is no sanity
The way I scream your name

Overwhelming sacrifice
I lay in your arms
This love could be sorrow
But that’s all tomorrow
In tonight there’s no harm

Untitled

Pinned shut from the world
I live in a utopia
Where Im captivated by
The look in my eyes
The smile on my face
The weight of my cries
And I
Can live within
Myself
While the rest of the world dies
By the trouble I see
The hopes I conceive
I fly higher
As the world grieves
Caught in selfishness
I cruise control above
I fix my eyes forward
I me My Mine
Life is fine
As old wine

Melody

Caught up in a mellow blues melody
The sax man playin’ my tune
Caught between the winter and
The gasping winds of June

Piano man stroking my soul
As I cry alone in my room
Caught between the woman and
A baby in the womb

The deeper my breath becomes
The more the singer croons
Caught between the sunshine
And the shadows round the moon

I know along this narrow road
Death be coming soon
Caught up in the melody
With shadows in its tune

Tears on the Back of my Hand

Tears on the back of my hand
Can i stand
the fire i am plunged into
is it true
divine image replicate thought
am i not
the daughter of the African plain
is it sane
high neck and brown eyes to the sky
tell me why
the heat permeates from my cheek
dare i speak
the words gathered up on my tongue
have they sung
places for my footsteps to go
is it so
the world living just as it planned
can I stand
the tears on the back of my hand

He Is My Man

The night was pure and brilliant
the wind was free yet tamed
he came from mists of smoke
he was but one in the same
The stars gave him his light
The earth colored his skin
The volcanos raised their magma
his voice came from within
his presence soared like eagles
his eyes scorched like sand
and there amongst shadows is me
yet in greatness he is my man.

Let Me

Let me be free
Let me be the essence of all I am
Let me be grand
Let my words flow like natural rivers
Off the tip of my tongue
Let me be the one
Let me be heroic
Let me be potent
Let my hands express the fire
That burns deep in my mind
Let me be sublime
Let me be an heiress to my throne
Let me be grown
Let my eyes express the magnitude
Of my religion
Let me be addition
Let me be love
Let me be above
Let me decipher the ideals
Hardest to discover
Let me be a lover
Let me be simply me
Let me be free

Untitled

I am alone within the mists of my jungle
The moss I thought was tame whips
Experiences into my back and blades
And I cannot shed a tear
I have to learn to be happy here.
And I hold my head up high
Against the battery of the wind
And I remember my God and
The people who carried me
Upon their backs for some years
I have to learn to be happy here.
The cool dew against my toes is nice
And the colors of the animals soothe
My insecurities about my steps linger
But soon are conquered my falling fear
I have to learn to be happy here.
At the end of this jungle path
Lies clear fields and golden honey dew
The maxillaria show me my destination
But that time is far from near
I have to learn to be happy here.

Hmmm

tis interesting isnt it
the way the wind blows,
the way my heart speaks,
the way the rivers flow
the way the world cries,
the way lovers bleed,
aint no questions simple baby,
aint no answers free

Hateful Confusion

Is it so wrong for me to hate you?
Your actions as dark and sinister
As the stripes on a tigers back
All the times you raped me
Of me
All the times you bludgeoned me
For me
Your words as cold and conniving
As the tip of a serpent’s tongue
All the times you spit at me
To define me
All the times you laughed at me
To reiterate me
Is it so wrong for me to hate you?
All the times you stepped on my neck
All the times you stole my respect
Every whelp on my back
Is proof of your attack
Every scar on my soul
Is reminder of that
Is it so wrong for me to hate you?
Why am I bloodied and scarred?
Why am I helpless and marred?
Why is this my problem?
I cry tears that you should drown in.
I hyperventilate breaths you should choke on.
This is your pain from your transgressions
You’ve lain about my throat.
Am I so wrong to want to give it back?
Your thoughts as evil and maniacal
As the grin on the face of a demon.
All the times you tripped me
To fall against your sword.
All the times you stabbed me
to kill my imaginings.
Am I so wrong to want to hate you?

Cracks 2 Creases

I am so good
Cracks turn to creases
In white linen pants
At a dinner party in France.

I am so good
Holes turn to hickory smoke
At a barbeque down South
Where the ribs melt in your mouth

I am so good
Cold turns to chuckles
Of a little chocolate boy
Playing with a Matchbox toy

I am so good
Darkness turns to dancing
A spicy tango
At a club everyone knows

But I am not the Divine
It is all in my mind
For I have to find some way
Not to lose my shine

The tears never stop
And the pain never ceases
But I am so good
Cracks turn to creases

The Apology

The night breeze rustles my senses
As I stare into the moonlit black.
And as the dreary night wreaked havoc on my soul.
I thought of all the wishes I should take back.
All the treasonous jealous spiteful things, inevitable of being alive.
The mocking pool of hidden sin in which mankind dives.
I bow my head in grief of all- the pain I caused in places.
All the moments of utter hopelessness, I caused in others` faces.

Unrestrained Self Esteem (Dedicated to my Inspiration, Madam Nikki Giovanni)

I am so smooth a baby could learn from me.
Looks so flawless like Queen Nefertiti.
Ruling over rulers like my girl Cleopatra.
Cry a river inside then smile right at ya.
Walk so graceful- a swan is a duckling..
Compared to me -Beautiful Ebony Queen.
Sexy as a starless night.
Calm as the eye of a storm
Secretive as a frat house yet Wild as a mustang.
I am so many light years ahead my sneezes Offer more insight than your textbook.
With a swirl of my hips I created the hula
A stamp of my foot created the drum
And the sound of my voice inspired the violin.
Einstein? Idiot. Aristotle? Dumb.
A request by me gave the world tequila and rum
Helen of Troy wasn’t a beauty queen
Compared to me- Beautiful Caramel Queen.
My smile made the sun buy shades.
When I’m angry tornados swirl away, Earthquakes shiver, volcanoes blush!
To me, Versailles is a shack
Everest a molehill,
Niagara a waterhole.
The Sahara, the Gobi, just two grains of sand.
My presence is so grand, the best orator in the WORLD cannot help But sssssttttuutttter.
Look to Webster, Love and Destiny are defined by my face.
Aphrodite? Peasant. Madonna? Naïve.
Compared to me- Beautiful Chocolate Queen.
I am so regal I taught the Queen of Sheba etiquette.
I am so rich diamonds line my shoes.
Rubies float in my bathwater and emeralds line my shower walls.
I am so influential clams spit their pearls out at me willingly.
Didn’t have to walk the catwalk to become the world’s beauty queen.
I fill powerful men’s dreams.
Alchemy needs my golden touch.
My legacy will go on forever.
Shakespeare? thoughtless, Marilyn Monroe?- homely.
Compared to me- Beautiful Mahogany Queen.

Comfortably Me

by:AK
I am comfortably me
And you obviously
Opinionate yourself
With your conceited struggles
Different worlds colliding to sweet catastrophe
Thus we are different
Yet very much the same
And in our moments
Of candle lit argument
I see you as you and hope you see me
And I laugh at our foolishness
Right cannot be gained where there is no answer
So let’s be comfortable,
Let’s be adequate
Seal it with silly talk
And agree to disagree
Cuz You see
You obviously believe in egocentricity
And I am comfortably me

Breathtaking

My breath stops at the feel of you
My eyes close my head tilts back
Soft kisses invoke sound from my throat
Inaudible, can’t speak
Knees go weak
Traces of nails across my shoulder blades
Smooth as water waves
Body pumping oceans
No lotions
Just moist lips and hips
Tongues and fingertips
Mellow Jazz lightly tickling my eardrums
As we make music of our own
Two people actin’ grown
Damn I love this man of mine
He commits murder every time my breath stops
But Ill never turn him in
This can’t be a sin
I’m shaking, I’m aching
My whole body awakened
I’m higher than the moon
Deep in my womb
My body’s arched
Throat parched
Ooo connects ahhh
Bursts into stars
Sweat, moves, and laughter break the bliss
To recoup the mind we lay sexy, free
Just as happy as you please
My man and me.

Untitled

The night was pure and brilliant
the wind was free yet tamed
he came from mists of smoke
he was but one in the same
The stars gave him his light
The earth colored his skin
The volcanos raised their magma
his voice came from within
his presence soared like eagles
his eyes scorched like sand
and there amongst shadows is me
yet in greatness he is my man.

Sister...

Dream my beautiful princess
Pick yourself up from the mire
And bring yourself forward
To the front of history
We are no longer Africa
We are no longer slaves
Stuck in the twilight days
Of our bruised egos
And ultra sensitivity
Heal my lovely sister
We share so many strengths
Yet we combine no grievances
And I struggle more today then ever
To call you sister
We are no longer enemies
We are no longer thieves
Fighting your way out to feel
Free sun against your back
So that we all can be
Confident in our tans
And happy in our hues
Love my magnificent queen
Today starts a new day
Of God and man where
You, precious one,
Can call yourself gold
And still be unsatisfied with the comparison
We are no longer heathen
We are no longer mutant
So dream my beautiful princess
Dream harder and louder so that even you
Will be stunned by the brilliance of your voice
And I like mother will stand proud in the distance
More happy with your success than my own.
That’s my beautiful sister.
Yes, That’s my identical one.